Pancakes on Christmas?!

Stimmblonian chops are lickin'
Whiskey on the rocks they're drinkin
Preasent wrappin and pancake stackin
Syrup crackin' and flapjack flappin
St. Nick is neer so have a beer
No fear of season cheer here dear
career is unclear engineer grab yer gear
There's a sleigh to load and cakes to pack
Around the globe and don't look back.
Sugar plums and candy canes
For bums and pains
Santa's nice list, only one request
Not dolls, puppies'r the rest
This year it'll be a great take
all I want is my pancake.

Anthem

There have been many requests for an official Anthem of Stimmblonia. That coupled with some absurd txting that entertained Mary Clare of Meal or No Meal during Chicago -> Des Moines trips has evolved into this first draft.

flap jacks on vessle Calypso Jacque's from Cousteau

short stacks bought to go, long ago escrow apropos

fo' sho' this turbulent flow approaches plateau

helter skelter, she spoke ill of the cakes so we delter 'er

the final blow, her ships in tow on Stimblonia's elbow

these are high stakes

we're not player fakes, so as day breaks

for pete's sakes make no mistakes it's pancakes!

spit ill of the cakes and make your mistakes

Stimmblonia will fill yer maw

stand in awe at our Coup d'état

these are high stakes

we're not player fakes, so as day breaks

for pete's sakes make no mistakes it's pancakes!

face the nation at its coronation this corporation ain't fakin with a side of bacon

Our embarcation 's illustratin' it's no fabrication incarnation

computation 's evaluatin' your abberration, your evolvin' and solvin' facin' annihilation and now appreciatin' the business relation of our discrimination.

these are high stakes

we're not player fakes, so as day breaks

for pete's sakes make no mistakes it's pancakes!

send a fax with the max facts your property tax funds flap jacks!

with battle ax or solid facts, clean out your ear wax you quacks,

it's flap jacks to the max or face the racks

execution is brewin so stop what your doing Stimmblonia is renewing

these are high stakes

we're not player fakes, so as day breaks

for pete's sakes make no mistakes it's pancakes!

Stimmblonia Communique #2

With the recent global, and midwest unrest, it is worth stating that every single Stimmblonian is happy. Both political parties (the ShortStackers and the TallStackers) have made concessions to the unorthodox syrupers. The laws governing syrup application to no more than 2-4 bites have been relaxed, allowing for now for to up to 1/3 of the pancake surface area. The protesters have gone home. The radical fruit and whipped cream extremists remain largely marginalized, and pose no risk to stability.

--The People of Stimmblonia

Stimmblonia Communique #1 Happy Pan Cog!

As we begin the observance of Pan Cog and the country relaxes, the rest of you may be noting the strange correlation with National Pancake Week. Pan Cog (rumored to be an adaptation of pancóg) starts with a two day fast of Forced French Toast traditionally suffered by the great people of Stimmblonia. It is said that the Glorious Leader, having run out of sacred milk for pancakes had a vision.

In the vision there were no cakes, only egg-coated bread. In its transparent attempt to emulate a cake, the offending, unnecessarily quoted, "food" did its best to imitate the perfect fluff of a cake. However, a spray-painting of chicken ovum puree over a loaf slice with suitable crumb is FAR from a proper cake. As any true Stimmblonian, the Glorious Leader suffered greatly. It is because of this that Pan Cog begins with the Forced French Toast ("FFT").

Though officially a day of reflection and awareness of the danger of imposers, commoners often use the pronunciation as a term of derision. Frequently it can be heard under bated breath, "Oh great, a place with no pancakes, I'd love to go there--'ffffft.'"

More news during the celebration!

-The People of Stimmblonia

It's Peanut Butter Stimmel Time!!!